Grace Junkies

Feeling down about yourself? Questioning past choices and actions? Do you seek out people or books that affirm you? Do you cut yourself off from people who don’t embrace you?  Are you a grace junkie? I define the term as someone who wants grace, feels that they desperately need grace from others, and will do anything to obtain it. Many of these are Christians, but God’s grace is insufficient for them in the moment. They want to be perfect and new NOW, like the televangelist with the perfect hair and the sparkling teeth. They want grace, but they don’t understand it. Sadly, they are often so desperate for grace that they are unwilling to share it with others.

It would be wonderful if grace was like paint primer. Something you could slather on with as many coats as needed to cover all defects and provide an opaque base for an attractive finish coat. But that isn’t what God wants. Why does God tell us in the Old Testament that Moses was a murderer? Was He wanting to rub Moses’ nose in his sins? Did we have to know that Rahab was a harlot? Was that to smear her throughout time and diminish her heroism? Did we really need to know that Saul persecuted and killed Christians before becoming Paul the Apostle? The heroes of the Bible aren’t defined by their pasts, but in knowing their pasts, we can appreciate that there is hope for us.

I’ve made countless mistakes in my life – some accidental and some intentional. God forgives me for these, and has cast my sins away from me to the very depths of the ocean. But even though He does not look at me and think “there’s that reprobate sinner”, He has not and will not blot them from MY memory. If you visit a vintage car show, you will encounter some remarkably restored cars – some looking even better than when they left the factory. Talk to the owners, though, and they can likely show you a photo album of what it was like when they found it and how much work it took to transform. I once restored an antique oak barber chair (much less challenging than a car), and when it came time to part with it the buyer wanted not only the restored chair, but the pictures I had of the pile of wood and metal with which I had started. You see, the present condition is made all the more remarkable by the previous condition. So it is that in embracing who I was, where I was, what I’ve done helps me bear witness to the work of God. Like David in the Psalms, we all still walk through the valley of the shadow of death. But that shadow has been lifted from us. Notwithstanding, we will encounter many shady people on the way and some will throw shade at us for the lives we’ve lived. It’s not for them, though, that we bear witness, but for those who are like we were and long to come out of the shadows.

Returning to the vintage car metaphor, let’s say you encounter two seemingly identical cars, both looking factory-fresh. You speak to the owner of the first and he tells you that he found the car rotting in a field, rust having consumed the floorboards and trunk, window glass a distant memory; and he describes the process he undertook to bring it back to the condition you now see. It almost seems miraculous.

Then you speak to the owner of the second car. He tells you how he bought the car new, stored it in a humidity-controlled garage, only removed the factory-original plastic seat covers immediately before the show at which you’re seeing it.

If you’re looking to restore a vintage car, which of these owners might prove a resource to you? The first owner who worked a seeming miracle on his car, or the second owner who simply protected what he had? If you ARE a vintage car, which owner would you want?  

In the legal system, there are many people who pass through with alcohol and/or substance abuse problems. As a condition of probation, many are required to meet with alcohol or substance abuse counselors. In hiring for these positions, the court looks for those who have not only completed the requisite training, but for those who have overcome alcohol or substance abuse issues in their own lives. You see, a tour guide is much more helpful if they have already taken the journey you’re undertaking.

I love God. Being a rational person, a primary reason must be the grace of God and His sacrifice for me. I have to confess that this love isn’t selfless, but more transactional. If He didn’t provide an exit strategy for the things I’ve done in this world, I would probably feel differently. I suspect that is why so many do not love God – they don’t recognize or understand the value in the transaction, or perhaps don’t even believe in the offer. God knows my past, but still wants me to be with Him. This is a transaction that is rarely offered in our daily lives. This is grace. Grace which I appreciate all the more knowing that I am undeserving. Family members, loved ones, friends – all have at one time or another looked at me and have agreed with me that I am undeserving of grace. I treasure those who have extended it anyway. In my life, I don’t want people who will pretend that my past doesn’t exist, nor do I want people who will force me to relive it. Rather, I want people who in knowing my past will marvel with me at the restoration. I’m not perfect. There is still some rust in the quarter panels and the wiring under the dash is frayed and subject to sparking, but I belong to God and He is perfecting me. The work He has done is a testament to His promise. In Philippians we are assure that when God has begun a good work in us He will be faithful to complete it. Looking around at the once broken people who claimed this promise, I can trust in claiming it, too.

A Crash Course in Life

Failure is not an option. Certainly a principle to embrace when striving toward a goal. But, after the strife, what if failure is the result? When facing the reality of changes that have occurred in life, when you feel shattered and disconsolate, it is important to step back and assess. After my divorce, all my household possessions went into storage. Some people would have made a clean break and abandoned all that came before, but I’ve always been a fixer. When something precious falls off a shelf – CRASH, I don’t just sweep the remnants into the trash, but rather I assess the debris and determine if there is a potential for repair. In repairing something precious, it becomes more valuable to me due to the investment of time, energy, and skill needed for its restoration.

Many things that came out of storage were not as they were when they went in. Such is the nature of moving. But I have come to recognize that not everything can be fixed and, if fixable, not everything is needed any longer. Many of those things no longer needed have been discarded – regardless of their condition. Similarly, some things are needed that did not survive the move and were not fixable.  These things, too, have been discarded.

I have come to a similar realization in my emotional life as well. When I left my career, it was not because I was ready to move on, but rather because I no longer had the emotional support to endure. In fact, with the death of my mom, the decertification of a labor organization of which I was president, and the filing for divorce coming in rapid succession; I found that I no longer could perform my job to the standard which I had set for myself.

What was lost? With the death of my mom, I also lost a relationship with my sister – CRASH! Throughout my life my sister had been a confidante and an advisor. She is remarkably talented and gifted in ways that I did not fully appreciate, except in her absence.

Then the decertification of my labor organization, CRASH! I was left to question a series of decisions and actions that perhaps left it vulnerable. Even in self-questioning, I became suspicious of the motives of those who remained.

With the divorce, CRASH!  I lost the person who had run my life, raised our children, and tempered me in a way that smoothed off my rough edges and connected me with others.

With retirement, CRASH! I lost the connection to friends and associates that had leant structure to my life.

As I continue to sift through the debris, I surprisingly have found the unexpected. Not broken pieces of disconnected relationships, but rather shattered pieces of myself. In such a situation, you can pursue one of two courses of action. You can look for someone to blame, or you can set about repair. I took the first option, but in looking for who was to blame I found the guilty party amongst the shards. That mask having been pulled off, I realized that I couldn’t rebuild the person in the ruins, nor did I want to. Gratefully, God wanted to. He reminded me that His strength is made perfect in weakness, and my brokenness afforded an excellent opportunity for His strength to be made manifest.

When my ex-wife left, she gave me a book on surviving shipwrecks. I dismissed it at the time as akin to giving someone clinging to the floating wreckage of a sunken ship a DIY book on how to build your own raft. In hindsight, I recognize it was more akin to throwing a drowning man a life preserver.

God has been a life preserver for me. Not a flesh restorer, but a life preserver. An eternal life preserver. Even as He has been this, I know He is faithful to restore the precious things lost. A new act in life’s play with a more seasoned cast of characters and a role that He has been preparing me to play.

In the Eye of the Beholder

We no longer live in a world of reality, but rather in a world of perception. Physics posited a multiverse with countless parallel dimensions, multiplying from each decision point. We, however, are now captive in a dimension with multiple realities all springing from the eye of the beholder. I began to observe this in my final years prior to retirement. Our Human Resources Department undertook a semi-annual training on the topic of sexual harassment. In the early years of this training, sexual harassment was defined by overt actions by an individual which were by consensus deemed to be crossing a line. If you did any or all of these actions, then you were guilty of sexual harassment. As the years passed, however, it was apparent that the definition of sexual harassment was changing. The issue of what you actually did became less significant than how you were perceived by an external observer. Sexual harassment became not what the Human Resources Department said it was, but rather what the victim said it was. If a male complements female 1 on her attire –“Hi Betty, you look nice today”, female 2 who overhears can become offended and legitimately claim sexual harassment. What was wrong with what was said to female 1? We won’t know until female 2 tells us. The reality of what has transpired is now irrelevant and is secondary to the perception of what has transpired. With the advance of technology, female 2 need not be present on the scene, but can instead be remotely viewing the scene well after the fact. By the time I retired, I was no longer comfortable pointing out to a female employee that she was in violation of the dress code because doing so could require me to overtly explain to her which articles were too revealing, too tight, or … Instead I would seek out a female coworker and ask her to assess the employee’s attire and speak to her if appropriate. Even that, though, by the end was insufficient insulation to prevent accusations. A female supervisor received a complaint about the attire of one of her subordinates. She called the employee in and suggested that her blouse was inappropriate and that the employee should either cover-up with a sweater or jacket, or go home and change. The employee pressed her with what was wrong with her blouse, and the she finally pointed out that the blouse was too tight, too sheer, and that her nipples were visible. The outcome of this was that the supervisor was accused of sexual harassment and, after studying the situation for several months, Human Resources concluded that that the supervisor should be admonished for having used the word “nipples”.

During my tenure with the court, there were two occasions wherein I was accused of racism. Both were investigated and I was thereafter absolved of any wrongdoing. I can’t help but wonder, however, how the same accusations would be treated in today’s climate. It should be noted that I am white, and my accusers were African-American. I recently dialoged with an African-American friend who, like me, worked for the superior court. She recounted several instances wherein white co-workers made racially ignorant and insensitive comments that betrayed that they either held innate prejudices or were influenced by generalized stereotypes. She concludes from these incidents that the organization was systemically racist, whereas I conclude that that the organization was systemically neutral, but with employees that at times behaved in a racist manner. The higher they were in the organization, the more they did to damage the organizations attempt at neutrality.

If you accept, as I do, that God created Man and that, as science agrees, we all have a common ancestry; then the concept of race becomes moot. In her book White Fragility, author Robin D’Angelo cites that there is no biological basis for race, but then turns around and makes skin color a determinant factor in society. Man is a discriminating creature. In establishing our own self-identity, we look for physical cues to differentiate ourselves from others and we take those cues to establish groupings. A tribe of pygmies might focus on height, a society of farmers might focus on attire. Differences in skin color have always been seized on by people as a point of differentiation. As soon as we find a point of differentiation, we start seeking patterns of behavior in our newly established groups, even though these different groups initially exist as constructs only in our own minds. We might conclude that people with big noses (meaning bigger than our own) are innately untrustworthy if we have a less than satisfying transaction with someone possessing a prominent proboscis. Having established a negative stereotype, it will take several positive interactions to overcome, if it can be overcome at all. As Shakespeare noted in Julius Caesar, “The evil that men do lives after them, the good is oft interred with their bones”. Our memory of negative experiences is stronger than our memory of positive experiences. Perhaps this is a survival trait that’s been reinforced over the eons, or perhaps it’s just a byproduct of original sin, which similarly cannot be overcome with good deeds. As a race (the human race), we are all creators of stereotypes. We use these as a shorthand for dealing with others whom we don’t know in initial interactions. But after that initial interaction, it is our obligation and duty to look beyond the simplistic narrowness of our own imaginations and get to know the heart of the person. Some of us are too lazy or too fixed in our prejudices to do this. Time is dealing with them now and God will deal with them later, just as there will necessarily be an accounting for media outlets that attempt to stoke division and animus in quest of clicks and views. President Barack Obama in his excellent A More Perfect Union speech eloquently commented on divisive statements his pastor had made, saying that “they expressed a profoundly distorted view of this country – a view that sees white racism as endemic, and that elevates what is wrong with America above all that we know is right with America; a view that sees the conflicts in the Middle East as rooted primarily in the actions of stalwart allies like Israel, instead of emanating from the perverse and hateful ideologies of radical Islam.”

We now see racialists trying to steal the progress that we have made and to demonize our founding fathers, imperfect humans that they were, and distort our history for political and financial gain. Even as they try to stoke a new civil war, let us remember the words of President Abraham Lincoln in his 2nd Inaugural Address as the last civil war drew to a close: “With malice toward none with charity for all with firmness in the right as God gives us to see the right let us strive on to finish the work we are in to bind up the nation’s wounds, to care for him who shall have borne the battle and for his widow and his orphan ~ to do all which may achieve and cherish a just and lasting peace among ourselves and with all nations.”

Those words are just as inspiring now as they were when spoken in 1865, however those who “have borne the battle” are today not those who donned a uniform, but rather those that have suffered as our nation has sought to better itself. It is important to remember that justice is not a destination, but rather a process.

The Just Shall Live by Faith

As citizens in a democratic republic, our government knows the will of the people only through the votes that they cast. Accordingly, voting is a civic duty not to be taken lightly. There are three main steps you must take to fulfill this duty:

Registering to vote

Researching the issues and candidates

Casting your ballot

It is nice to imagine that after taking these steps that your vote will be counted and weighed in the outcome of the respective election. The key to fair elections is the concept of “One person, one vote”. However, the value and impact of any one vote is predicated upon the belief that the person voting is:

Eligible to cast a ballot

Has not voted previously or subsequently in the same election

Has completed and cast their own ballot

Every time a person fraudulently participates in an election, that person is negating the choice of a lawful voter. Every time a fraudulent ballot is discovered to have been cast, the confidence of the people in an honest outcome is diminished.

I confess that on occasion I have not voted in an election due to not having fully researched the issues and candidates. Having not taken the time to know the facts, I would have considered it inappropriate to cast a ballot and in so doing potentially ignorantly skew the outcome of the election.

Fundamental and tangential to the right to vote is the secret ballot. What and whom we vote for should be a matter for of our own conscience. We should not be subjected to criticism and possible repercussions for our views or beliefs. Though we often forfeit our anonymity by placing yard signs or contributing financial support to causes and candidates we believe in, that is a choice we make.

Unfortunately, a secret ballot invites the possibility of fraud. Let’s imagine that Candidate A and Candidate B are running for office in your district/community. You strongly support Candidate B and cast your vote accordingly. So long as the election results in your district/community show that at least one ballot was cast for Candidate B, then the election may have been fair. However, you may doubt the outcome if only one vote was counted for your candidate, though that one vote may well have been yours and perhaps you were the only person in your district/community that voted for Candidate B. So, to lend credibility to the election results, there are frequently poll watchers who observe the counting of the ballots. With partisan poll watchers, each representing opposing sides in the election, the counting process can usually be deemed to be fair.

However, ballots are rarely counted in real-time. In most circumstances, they are collected and taken to a central counting location. There is typically an audit between the number of people who signed-in to vote in a district/community and the number of ballots collected. However, this number need not be even if voters with absentee ballots have dropped-off their completed ballots at the polling location. An added complication is that these voters, though registered as absentee voters, are eligible to vote in person should they so choose. This suggests the possibility of double voting – one person, two or more votes. If you voted by mail, you additionally have to trust the U.S. Postal Service to have properly delivered your ballot to the Registrar of Voters in your county/district. It is not unheard of for mail to go undelivered by mail carriers through simple laziness. If you live in a postal ZIP code that trends toward one party or candidate, and your mail carrier favors the other candidate, it is not beyond the realm of belief to suspect that your mail-in ballot might not reach its destination, if you even received your mail-in ballot at all.

Now, having cast your ballot, you have to trust that your secret ballot, with no identifying marks to potentially void your anonymity, will be safely transported and counted. In the criminal justice system, there exists a chain of custody regarding evidence, meaning that you must be able to demonstrate where the evidence was gathered and the consistent chain of custody within the criminal justice system before that evidence is presented in court. Break that chain, and the evidence is out. So, in our electoral system, the physical ballot is the evidence, including any accompanying documentation in the case of absentee ballots. However, there is no chain of custody. By the time your ballot reaches the counting station, there is no proof that the ballot you cast is the ballot being counted. Similarly, there is no proof that the absentee ballot counted was cast by the voter to whom it was mailed. In truth, there is no proof that your ballot ever reached the counting station.

Hoping though that the process worked and the poll watchers have watched the handling of your ballot, you have to trust that it will be counted correctly. Typically, the paper ballots are fed into an electronic machine that tabulates the votes based on the marks on the ballot. The programming of these machines is done behind closed doors by persons not vetted by either party. Additionally, the machines may or may not be connected to the internet, opening the door for even more chicanery.

In our effort to make voting easier and more accessible, we have made it far more possible to perpetrate fraud. With easy voting comes a lessening in trust. I cast a ballot in the last election. I trust that the process worked as it should. Looking back, though, there were a number of documented anomalies that have caused reasonable people to question the result. Although this is a concern, history has shown us that if an election is stolen, it stays stolen.

I did have confidence, though in our voting system here in the State of California. However, my faith in our local electoral system was recently shaken. I recently received notice from the San Diego County Registrar of Voters that I am now registered to vote in San Diego County, though I live in Riverside County. Lest I be concerned about not receiving voting materials, they indicated that they would mail my voting materials for San Diego County to me in here in Riverside County. Proof of this, they also mailed me a mail-in ballot for a special election occurring in April in San Diego County.

I predictably called the San Diego County Registrar of Voters to enquire as to what triggered my registration in San Diego. The very courteous woman to whom I spoke (I love San Diego County public employees, having been one for more than 30 years) informed me that my registration had been changed by the California Department of Motor Vehicles. Looking at the timeline, I saw that it roughly coincided with the renewal of the registration on my car. Strangely, nowhere on the renewal was any address other than my address in Riverside, and I received my validated registration at my address in Riverside. Stranger still was that the address to which I had been registered in San Diego was not an address at which I had ever been licensed to drive or had registered a vehicle.

I confess that I was unwilling to invest the time required to contact the Department of Motor Vehicles. Their customer service is nowhere near that of San Diego County and, when you encounter a giant cauldron of stupid, it is best not to stir. Sadly, though, I will have to invest the time to re-register to vote in Riverside County. I have always been too trusting, and I will continue to hope that any votes I cast are counted. I am reminded, though, of the quote from that famous socialist leader Josef Stalin who is reputed to have said “He who votes decides nothing, he who counts the votes decides everything”.

Still, the Bible teaches us that the just shall live by faith.1 As Christians, we should vote by faith as well. Not faith in an imperfect and irreparably bent earthly system, but faith that all is unfolding according to His plan. I find that reassuring and calming when I am anxious. I pray that you do, too.

1Romans 1:17 For therein is the righteousness of God revealed from faith to faith: as it is written, The just shall live by faith.

Nothing New Under the Sun…

I miss libraries. Sprawling collections of books, organized by author or subject, all available for immediate perusal or for withdrawal for study in depth. I recall many times going to our city’s central library, not in quest of a particular title, but instead looking for something to read. Biography, history, how-to, fiction; it was all there. Wandering the stacks would take my mind from subject to subject – a favorite author, a personality from history, a myriad of thoughts, ideas, and skills were all there at my command. Sometimes I would sit there and read, though more often I would go home with as many books as I could carry on my bicycle.

When I was a boy, I was drawn to books on history and biography. Looking back, I note that I was drawn to biographies of military or political leaders, rather than inventors. I think this was because, when I read the biographies of leaders, they always seemed to possess some directionality. Their early lives often pointed to their later achievements as though there was some force of destiny or hand of God forging their paths. With inventors, though, it was usually a moment of inspiration – a point where an idea came to them that changed their lives and changed the world. Leaders seemed like stones in a stream. A current carried them forward while the forces of movement smoothed their rough edges, seemingly perfecting them for their destination. Inventors, though, typically did not experience and benefit from the forces of movement. They remained little people with big ideas. Henry Ford gave us the assembly line, yet he remained a bully and a rabid anti-Semite until his death. Thomas Edison gave us the light bulb, yet he remained an opportunist who would appropriate the work of others as his own and exploit it for financial gain.

Although I am rambling to an extent, I see a connection coming. In our world today, the greatest inventions consist of how information is gathered, stored, disseminated, and shared. We have organizations such as Alphabet, Amazon, Facebook, Apple, and others that now exert tremendous influence over our lives. Behind each of them are inventors who are now fabulously wealthy and powerful, but like inventors in the past, they have not been personally improved by the creative process. That is what can result in us having a base, little man now being the wealthiest person in the world and the final arbiter of what we should think and read. This man is now in charge of a virtual book-burning, while the leaders of the other technopolies collude and conspire with one another so as to speak with one voice. Virtual book burnings achieve the same result as the literal book burnings of the 1930’s, but without the telltale smoke.

Every tyranny inflicted in human history has needed a scapegoat. Some person or group to point to in justification of acts that would otherwise be unthinkable. Hitler blamed the communists and the Jews. If there was a problem in the world, it was ultimately their fault. It is widely accepted that Hitler was behind the Reichstag fire that effectively ended democratic government in Germany. Hitler, though, blamed his political opponents and, of course, the Jews. In the 1950’s, we were told of the Red Menace. Senator Joseph McCarthy warned of communists having infiltrated all of our institutions. He was thwarted in his tyrannical efforts by a non-compliant media. TV, radio, and print media exercised the freedom of the press afforded them by our Constitution and shed a harsh light on his efforts, driving him back into the shadows from which he came.

We are now seeing a parallel in our own time. The new scapegoat is white supremacy and racism.  Although I’ve heard and read about white supremacists, in my experience they have always been poor, white, and deeply flawed people who banded together to march or party. Ignorant and ignored, they merited no attention until they ran afoul of the criminal justice system.  These people were obviously racist, as they openly proclaimed their self-perceived superiority. Their numbers were declining, though, over time. We could reasonably look forward to a day when their beliefs died out owing to their own ignorance. Apparently, I was mistaken. Having recently read Robin D’Angelo’s White Fragility, I learned that racism is everywhere. It is systemic. Much like the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia identified “intellectuals” as anyone with eyeglasses (and then murdered them), you can tell racists today by the color of their skin. If you are white, you are racist. Comically, we have a government led largely by old, white people promoting this viewpoint. Apparently, it does truly take one to know one.

We recently had a riot in Washington, D.C. This came from a peaceful demonstration of people who had supported what was then the current president and who believed that through chicanery and electoral fraud that the election held this past November was effectively stolen. Not speaking to that topic, these demonstrators were largely white. This is not because they were racists or white supremacists, but because the media had largely accused the sitting president of being a racist. Their motivation in doing this was twofold – to suggest that anyone who supported him was also racist, and to disincentivize minorities who had experienced dramatic economic progress during his term from supporting him. Electoral victories are typically won on pocketbook issues, and the media knew that without their intervention this would be decided similarly. An extremely small subset of demonstrators “assaulted” the capitol. We are told that this was an armed insurrection by white supremacists. Downplayed in this is that the Capitol Police, some of whom were sympathetic to the demonstration, opened the doors and allowed many of the “insurrectionists” to enter. We are told that one officer was killed by the insurrectionists, having been beaten to death with a fire extinguisher. However, we know that this same officer was on the phone with family members after the “insurrection” and his autopsy showed no signs of blunt force trauma. Still, he was accorded something akin to a state funeral for his role in giving his life in defense of the capitol. Our government still suppresses his full autopsy report to this date. Looking back at our historical parallels with the past, we can be reminded of Horst Wessel, the famous Nazi martyr. This is not to suggest that anyone on either side of the issue holds views similar to the Nazis, however it should not be forgotten that the Nazis were socialists, and socialism has never ascended to power in a nation with free speech, a free media, and free elections. This should give us pause.

The next step, already underway, is to round-up the alleged insurrectionists from across the country for trials in Washington, D.C. The narrative will be that armed white supremacists supporting the former president staged an attempted coup. Reporting will be shaped and focused to support that storyline. How such a coup would have played out, since at the time the person they allegedly supported was the president, has never been and will never be explained.

However, the “insurrection” (Reichstag fire?) was and is being used as justification to strip even more freedoms away from the American people. Soon the commission assembled to study the events of the “insurrection” will release their findings. If we are looking for an informed, sober, and impartial review we should expect disappointment, since those on the commission were chosen for their biases, not for any impartiality. They know or were told what their findings will be and will focus on culling evidence to support their conclusions. Sadly, we will only be allowed to hear the government conclusion, and all we like sheep will be led astray. Indeed, many of us will bleat loudly and demand that our freedoms be stripped away from us for our own safety, insisting that the wolves in leadership protect us.  

With that, the American experiment will draw to a close. It has been noted that the United States does not appear in Biblical prophecy. With our nation being a superpower, this was baffling. It is less baffling, though, as we watch America squander its legacy and recede from prominence on the world stage. Our fifteen minutes of fame is nearly over.  

The Clockmaker

Clocks have been a hobby of mine for many years. Although I have expended time and energy to gain a modicum of skill in their service and repair, my efforts have been of limited result. My nephew once characterized my efforts as “killing clocks”. My shelves of clocks and parts sadly suggest that his assessment was not too far from the truth. Notwithstanding, I confess to a fascination with mechanical clocks. Did you know that the term “clock” should only be applied to those with a striking and/or chiming train? This is because our word “clock” derives from the German word “glock”, meaning “bell”. Those clocks that do not strike the hour should more appropriately be called timepieces. But I digress, and for the purpose at hand I beg your indulgence should I refer to both clocks and timepieces with the generic term “clock”.

Clocks, in their simplest form, simply tell time. They have only one train (mechanism), the going train, which is solely purposed to release the energy of the spring or weight in a measured fashion to move the hands in order to display the time. Usually this type of clock will consist of gears fashioned from wood or brass, a spring, or possibly a weight in lieu of a spring. The clock is triggered to motion by either winding a spring or lifting a weight. An additional complication often encountered in clocks is a striking train (mechanism) which, like the going train, is purposed to release the energy of its respective spring or weight in order to strike the time (most commonly on the hour and the half hour). Some clocks have a third chiming train (mechanism) which, like the going and striking trains, is solely purposed to release the energy of its respective string or weight in order to play a melody prior to the striking train giving its report. With each possessing similar gears and levers, and with some having greater complications in comparison to those from earlier eras, it would not be surprising if someone surveying these structures might see a relationship between them with a seeming evolution from the earlier clocks to the later.

Their error would come, though, if they tried to surmise a natural process to the changes they see. They could potentially write a book, examining the similarities between some and the dissimilarities between others. They might spend their lifetime searching for a transitional clock that possessed the gears and spring of a going train, but had developed additional gears as it progressed toward developing a striking train. They would study the environment necessary that possessed the necessary building blocks of clockworks and lecture on the implications.

Of course, this could only happen in a society where clocks were foreign and strange and no one possessed any knowledge of their origin. We would never do this, because we know that each clock was fashioned from human knowledge and skill. No speculation is necessary regarding their origin because we know the creator.

This occurred to me, perhaps spurred by my fondness for clocks, as I looked at the marvel implicit in both the microcosm and the macrocosm of the world around us. Scientists stroke their beards and posit theory upon theory as to origins and destinies. We frantically panic that somehow through our actions we have somehow upset the natural order and fret that its now imperative that we fix the world and restore order. All the while ignoring our own arrogance in believing that puny mankind could break the world and, even more arrogantly, has the knowledge to fix it.

As Christians, we enjoy the luxury and the simplicity of marveling at the stars, at the miracle of life existing and regenerating around us, all the while with our hearts and minds at ease. We needn’t trouble ourselves with origins or destinies because, as with clocks, we know the Creator.

The Bridge Between Death and Life

An old movie I recently watched featured a scene where the two protagonists were fleeing a group of villainous ne’er-do-wells. They reached a point in their flight when they encountered a rickety rope bridge stretching across a vast chasm. Of course, this was their only means of escape so they reluctantly began a perilous journey across.

It occurred to me that, too often, we look upon our faith journeys in a similar fashion. The Bible tells us that the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing1. So, to those who are perishing (lacking faith) our journey of faith appears very similar to the rickety rope bridge in our cinematic example. If it does not inspire trust in them, why does it affect us differently? The answer is simple. Those who are perishing are unaware of that truth, whereas the understanding of our untenable existence without Christ drives those of us with understanding onto the bridge out of a sense of desperation. As in the cinematic example, each footfall builds faith. As we progress, we find that we are no longer looking down, but are rather looking forward and up. I imagine it was a similar experience for the Children of Israel as they crossed the Red Sea. Their first steps were hesitant, tentative, fearful; but the understanding of the certain death that awaited them if they did not cross spurred them onward.

Some of us are at different points in our journey. We may be reluctantly extending a single toe, unsure if God’s promises will support us; others are journeying resolutely, gaining both confidence and speed with each step; while still others among us are frozen mid-span, unwilling to go forward or back. For those who are hesitating or frozen in fear, I would remind you to focus not on the journey, the bridge, the seabed; but rather to focus on the destination. For us, that destination is a personal relationship with a loving Savior who knows us more intimately than anyone in this world and forgives and accepts us. You won’t know that experience if you do not keep moving. Jesus is calling… DON’T LOOK DOWN!  

1 1 Corinthians 1:18 For the preaching of the cross is to them that perish foolishness; but unto us which are saved it is the power of God.

Sour Notes

I spent the better part of the day recently working on a music box. When I say “better part”, it is not because I spent the majority of the day so occupied, but rather that of those activities that filled my day, this was the comparatively better part. Musical movements are remarkably simple in principle. A winding key stores energy in a spring, a governor regulates the release of this energy to a rotating cylinder, and individual pins on the cylinder connect with individual tines of varying length on a comb, producing a melody. Simple, though a remarkable degree of precision is required in the functioning of each element to produce a pleasant melody, rather than an inharmonious cacophony. The movement that held my attention today, even prior to my efforts, played beautifully… with the exception of one discordant note.

Now, it would have been easy enough to ignore since the problematic note occurred only once during the rendering of two very pleasant melodies, but it was a flaw that could be corrected. As I worked on the box, it occurred to me how remiss we often are in rectifying the discordant notes in our own lives. As Christians, we can so easily make allowances for our shortcomings with a dismissive “God isn’t done with me yet” or “His strength is made perfect in my weaknesses”. These statements, true though they are, often allow us to excuse us from making any effort to rectify those flaws which are well within our ability to address. Personally, I have difficulty with relationships. There are people in my life whom I dearly love, but I defer to them to do the work of maintaining open lines of communication. I expect that they understand it is hard for me and in so understanding they are obligated to reach out and connect. As in a musical movement, I am expecting them to twist the winding key and inject energy into the relationship. As I wait for them, the relationship languishes motionless and silent.

With my fondness for things mechanical, I have repeatedly explained (lectured?) to my family that the worst thing you can do to any mechanism is not to use it. That musical movement that plays so beautifully may struggle to overcome the inertia if left unused for months or years. How sad that I did not grasp that the same truth exists in the mechanics of relationships. Years ago a friend with whom I shared a mutual enthusiasm for vintage radios showed me his collection. High shelves lined almost every room of his home with an amazing collection of radios from the 1920’s and ‘30’s. Each one had been carefully restored and gleamed in polished cabinets with exotic inlays and intricate designs. He proudly told me that every one of them played. However, the truth was that every one of them played at the time it was placed on the shelf. He had a collection of fully restored radios, but he could only make that claim if he was careful never to plug them in again and test them.  He had an incredible collection of radios, but possessed none that he could listen to and enjoy, as any attempt to do so would shatter his illusion.

So, as with musical movements and radios, relationships do not sit static while you live your life. Each relationship strikes a certain note in your heart and to ignore them is to sentence yourself to a silent and lonely life. God has set the tune, and I am going to work to restore and repair the missing and discordant notes of the song that is my life.

When God Casts His Vote…

I was struck by a recent study in the Book of Daniel wherein God demonstrated his power over the kingdoms of the earth. As we in the United States are presented with a presidential election, it is striking that in this moment we are not faced with a selection among the best and the brightest, but rather two men who their respective parties have deemed electable. The most successful (meaning electable) politicians in our society are often those that are most willing to compromise every moral and ethical principal in pursuit of power. Their parties assessment of electability means that they are deemed not to be the best person, but rather the best able to sway a sufficient number of the 56% of our voting age population who are expected to vote and who are residing in the appropriate locations to enable them to win the election. But in the current race strangely, and sadly, each candidate is campaigning for the other. One candidate’s message is “Vote for me! I’m less repugnant than the other guy!”; while the message of the other is “Vote for me! I don’t have dementia!”. Every time either of these men take the stage, they drive voters to their opposite, either by their overt repugnancy or their apparent cognitive decline. Who will win? Well, the repugnant candidate doesn’t listen to his handlers, so he won’t step back from the stage. His opponent hasn’t the capacity to ignore his handlers, so he is largely being hidden from public view. However, his absence testifies to his decline.

The Soviet tyrant Joseph Stalin is reputed to have said “Those who vote decide nothing. Those who count the vote decide everything”. In secular society, that thought rings true because of the conviction that the affairs of mankind are decided by mankind. However, those who know God know it to be false. Daniel 4:17 recounts the revelation from God to King Nebuchadnezzar “This matter is by the decree of the watchers, and the demand by the word of the holy ones: to the intent that the living may know that the most High ruleth in the kingdom of men, and giveth it to whomsoever he will, and setteth up over it the basest of men”. It reasserts God’s authority as stated in Daniel 2:21 “And he changeth the times and the seasons: he removeth kings, and setteth up kings: he giveth wisdom unto the wise, and knowledge to them that know understanding:” In our present day we should do well to remember that God is Sovereign over all nations. A proof of this will come for us in less than two weeks as God sets up over us “the basest of men”.  I won’t speculate as to who will win. But I know that there is only one vote that counts, and His has already been cast is not dependent on the U.S. Postal Service for delivery. His will be done. Hallelujah!

The Promise

I was already old when He called me. Too old, my wife Zipporah said; but you don’t say “no” to God – or at least you don’t finish with “no”. Now, Egypt was but a faint echo. Zipporah more distant, more remote. I brought the people out to this barren place. For forty years I prayed for deliverance, for forgiveness… but God’s “no” possesses a firmness I could not muster those many years ago. I would not cross over.

I started this trek early, before the dew and while the stars still clung to the sky. Standing on the mountain, I looked out over the valley. The hot wind off of the desert chafed on my skin, heated by the mid-morning sun. Soon the day’s fiery heat would bear down on me with a fierce blast. Once more into the furnace to fire away the abandonment, disappointment, and resentment that each passing day stoked within me. I strained to catch a note in the air. Perhaps a fragrance, the mere hint of a land, long promised, but denied to me. I was rewarded only with dry, lifeless, dust; dust that would soon claim me as its own.

I imagine the foregoing as how Moses must have felt at the end of his life. We think of a long life as a blessing, but it may not seem as such to someone who has spent so many of those years waiting. My mother, throughout my childhood, waited expectantly for the rapture and read a library of books identifying the Antichrist. Spoiler alert: It wasn’t King Juan Carlos of Spain. So it is now, with many Christians convinced that we are in the last days. However, every generation since the resurrection has been convinced that Jesus’ return was imminent. And it was imminent. And it is imminent. My mother, who died of cancer several years ago, has seen it. My father-in-law and mother-in-law, both having passed from this world, have seen it. Moses experienced the promised land, and his eyes are still not dimmed1. Such is God’s timing. All things will be fulfilled, and all things have been fulfilled.

1 Deuteronomy 34:7 And Moses was an hundred and twenty years old when he died: his eye was not dim, nor his natural force abated.